Oh, Nostalgia

Ever notice how the movies you loved when you were little usually end up being total cheese if you watch them as an adult?

This is, of course, not true of all movies, such as Charlotte's Web, Fern Gully, anything Disney, animated or live action. But things like, say, Labyrinth. Or the movie that I just finished watching, Dragonheart. I remember loving that movie. But watching it just now on--what else---the CW, I was struck by what an absolutely horrid movie it really is. In all honesty the storyline has a lot of promise: dragon shares a heart with dying boy only to have boy turn into evil king, and in the ultimate sacrifice dies so that evil king might die, too. Seriously, the stuff of classic fantasy. I even like the way the dragon is animated, in a digitized Jim Henson style. But as soon as you see his mouth moving and Sean Connery's voice coming out of it, we're done. Added to that the lame dialogue; the declarations of plot by the main characters; the freakish combination of Dennis Quaid, long hair and a semi-developed character; the piss-poor fight choreography, including a few scenes in which a 5'6" woman takes on and beats two full-fledged knights, not by being nimble but in a blow-for-blow axe fight--right, that's gonna happen; and last but not least, the ridiculous "look to the stars" epilogue. Gag me.

The cool thing, though is that there were several actors in it who have since moved on to better things. Dennis is, fortunately, not one of them. But obviously Sean Connery is just amazing, end of story. And then there are David Thewlis and Jason Isaacs. No, they're not exactly Brad or Mel (in)famous, but they are ever so much more important. Why, you may ask. Because they, Mssrs. Thewlis and Isaacs, are key players in the ongoing Harry Potter saga. I was watching the Dragonheart, and knew that I knew the evil king from somewhere, so the next step was logical: the Internet Movie Database (IMDb). Turns out the actor was our Mr. Thewlis, who just happens to play Professor Remus Lupin in The Prisoner of Azkaban and in the forthcoming Order of the Phoenix, which is due to wrap filming this month. Also featured in those movies, and I believe in all the other ones, is Mr. Isaacs, aka Distilled Disdain, aka Lucius Malfoy. Such a good pick for the role, especially after his performance in The Patriot.

One of the actors that I have not seen in a Harry Potter movie and would like to see is Patrick Stewart. Yes, I know that he's pretty much Captain Picard, but I always thought that Alan Rickman would always be the Sheriff of Nottingham (Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves), and yet he is not only a wonderful Snape but has been able to branch out and do a marvelous job in Love Actually. I think that Jean-Luc--I mean, Patrick--would be able to branch out just as admirably. Also, I think it might be cool if Sean Connery had a part, though that might be to many Lowlandesque accents.

Well, that was a lot. I think I'm going to watch David Bowie in near-drag now. I know, I know--I just finished saying that Labyrinth was cheese, but it's cult cheese with some good music, awesome Jim Henson puppets, and great childhood memories attached. Not gonna lie, I'm still kind of turned on by David like this, even though my brain goes euuw. I may follow it up with one of Tom Cruise's earlier works, Legend. Also cheese, but I have an absolutely clear memory of the first time we watched it. I was either 6 or 7, and we were living on East Carmel in Mesa, AZ. My dad was at an academy--I think it was the NCO (Non-Commissioned Officer) academy that time. When Dad went away, Mom and my brothers and I would have at least one night that was a "sleepover" night. That day we went to Blockbuster, got Labyrinth, and then to the Giraffe Frozen Yogurt place for pistachio fro-yo. That night we had dinner then got into our PJs. Mom gave us each a pillow and sent us out the back door so we could go around to the front door and ring the bell like at a real sleepover. We had M&Ms, and I was eating the pistachio yogurt the first time I saw Tim Curry as the Lord of Darkness. It was awesome.

Oh, nostalgia.

Song of the Moment: "Dance Magic"~David Bowie from Labyrinth


PS. If you've never heard Meli Barber swear, you really should. Seriously, one of the funniest and most shocking things ever.